Today, however, after reading an article on Shine, I couldn’t help but wonder if I’ve actually been guilty of the very crime I vowed I’d never commit.
As the title of the article itself readily shows, “Ways to let go of an Emotional Love Affair” provides means for overcoming the “addiction.” While there is nothing in the whole article which directly tells you if you’re having an affair with another, there are, nonetheless, helpful hints.
The first tell-tale sign of being emotionally involved with another person is the fact that one incessantly thinks of him/her (hopefully not while driving the car or talking to the boss). Such obsession leads the person from effectively performing daily tasks, e.g., remaining faithful to your actual girl/boyfriend or wife/husband.
If conjuring up images of the besotted one is the only activity which seems to brighten up your day, this is likewise another sign that you’re hung up on another person. Obviously, your “legal” significant other no longer sends up shivers on your spine at this point. According to the article, being in such a state of “affairs” is a way of escaping loneliness.
The entire article is helpful as it understands that quitting an emotional love affair cannot be simply done cold turkey. There are steps to follow for the sick at heart.
Let me just state for the record that I am a happily married person. Spine shivers no longer occur daily at the sight of the husband but I understand that true love isn’t what pocketbooks say it is. But I do remember a time when I may have been significantly involved with one person and yet intellectually pre-occupied with another. Of course, at the time that this emotional attachment with another person occurred, I was still legally single (although, as I have said, significantly involved).
The other person was not one I’d ever consider attractive. His physical attributes surely wouldn’t have led to the improvement of the gene pool – well, at least not on my side. But it was his intellect which appealed to me. After more than enough late night conversations with him, I’d begun to think of him differently.
It lasted for a while, the so-called affair. I wouldn’t be so sure as to call it a love affair. I mean, I wouldn’t have said the three oft-abused words to his face even if my life depended on it. But there was something there – at least, intellectually.
The entire thing was just all in the mind, shared though it may have been by two persons. Thankfully, it did not lead us into something we both would have regretted later on. But it did leave a mark, as chicken pox does to one’s skin.
